I open new doors to life

Hello again fellow affirmers, 

Well I have to say that this project is much more difficult than I initially supposed. Making the time is always a challenge, however by far the biggest problem is finding an affirmation that I can truly commit to without the cynic in me just laughing out loud.  If I can’t embody the message of the affirmation, then the whole exercise is a waste of energy. No matter how compelling the words are, they are just words, mere symbols. The power to manifest their truth into my life lies only within the self!

Like most people, when I began my conscious spiritual exploration some 26 years ago, I read most of the popular texts of the day. Despite being completely Western in their values, authors like Louise Hay, Sanaya Roman and others spoke to me so lovingly that I felt supported and safe while in their company. It was the first time in my life I had felt that way and I was like a moth to the flame. I have been insatiable ever since. 

I was a diligent student, I still am. I remember cutting out little colour coded cards and using a calligraphy pen, I wrote out a hundred or so daily affirmations so I could divine one each day. (I still have them in a cute basket, though they have gathered dust) The statements I found particularly attractive (financial independence and freedom) I carried in my wallet, along with money herbs and interestingly, meagre cash. I said many personal affirmations in front of the bathroom mirror, but in those days, I could barely meet my own eyes without pain and harsh judgement. Despite my considerable commitment, affirmation never worked for me. I am still waiting for the financial freedom and the reason I can look upon myself more gently today has nothing to do with affirmation and everything to do with my heart awareness – a pathway that took years to navigate.

So my truth around affirmation is that it has always shown me where I am not. When I looked in the mirror as I repeated a thought that "I was enough," I would be immediately and acutely aware of all the feelings rising to the surface that screamed my unworthiness. When I affirmed financial independence, my feelings would reveal all my fears where I could see I didn’t have enough money to spare or share. Some people might explain these contradictions as waiting for the physical to ‘catch up’ to your new thought process. The problem was, the reality never shifted, even given time. 

Any effort with affirmation always showed me the truth of my life as it was as opposed to how I ‘thought’ or wished it should be. It helped clear denial as well as highlight that thought alone, no matter how positive, could not silence the effect of my feelings that were so tumultuous and often very ugly. A deep desire to find the source of those feelings and then to heal them led to the birth of the process contained in the book *Your Beautiful Life. In hindsight, my failure at affirmation has been an enormous blessing. 

I mentioned in my first blog that I am emerging from an intense period of challenges that began 7 months ago. From a spiritual perspective I have been in a period of death, decay, gestation and am moving now into fertilisation and finally, thankfully rebirth. Yesterday’s blog reminded me to be an empty vessel and surrender my ideas of ‘knowing’ in favour of ‘not knowing’. It therefore feels completely appropriate to revisit my spirituality where it all began; that is, with affirmation that encourages you to lovingly, fully engage life.

So today I am going back in time to Louise Hay, surely she is the affirmation Guru? I’ve not read anything she has done for more than 26 years, but how can I not love her? After all, she was at the first spiritual door I approached and I found only love. 

                                   The affirmation of the day is: I open new doors to life.

Now that is pretty appropriate hey? Seems I am finally in the flow with this project! I might even write it on a card.

So people, let’s work with this affirmation for a few days, diligently, while noticing what feelings it triggers as well as what opportunities come in. I would love to hear from anyone who is taking this journey with me.

Namaste

Sally  
 * www.yourbeautifullife.com.au for more information